Yesterday I completed my eighth half marathon. It was fantastic. I was passed by senior citizens. I was passed by speed walkers. I was passed by pregnant women (and therefore passed by fetuses). The race was an enormous success. In true tortoise fashion, I ran slowly and steadily. I came in with a plan, and … Continue reading Progress Not Perfection
Being sore after a race is expected. Aches? Blisters? They're about as mandatory and medals and free t-shirts. Today I achieved a first -- I managed to leave a race sore without even running. My throat hurts from cheering. My hands hurt from clapping. My cheeks hurt from smiling. A loved one completed a community 10k, and I was completely swept … Continue reading Cheering Section
Everyone loves a fast runner. We give them medals. We give them money. We buy magazines to read interviews with Usain Bolt or Kara Goucher. Aesop taught us that slow and steady wins the race, but all evidence points to the contrary.But that doesn't mean that only the fast are welcome. Running is open to … Continue reading I Am the Tortoise
I said I wouldn't do another. Training was brutal, and once was enough. I lost sleep. I lost toenails. I lost touch with friends. For half a year, I did nothing but work, eat, and run. Completing the 2011 Twin Cities Marathon ranks among my proudest moments, but it came at a cost. So I thought … Continue reading Take Two
If you've participated in any type of community race, you've run amongst tutus. They're everywhere. They're silly, they're festive, they mask imperfect butts and thighs. A little childish? Sure. A bit stupid? Perhaps. But deserving of nationwide ridicule? Of course not. A good reason to mock someone who has cancer and runs a nonprofit? Hellllllllll no. … Continue reading Friendly Reminder: Be Nice
Some days running is pure joy. Today was not one of those days. I'm waaaaaaaay behind schedule. Way behind. I'm scheduled to run a half marathon in two months, and prior to today I hadn't trained more than three miles. Motivation has been a huge problem this spring. I've still laced up and gone running … Continue reading JFDI
I'm not afraid of much, but the weights section of the gym terrifies me. Not the equipment itself (although that can be daunting), but the the other weightlifters. They're big. They're strong. They know what they're doing. At my local gym, most weightlifters fall into one of two categories: hulking, grunting muscle bots or tan, beautiful selfie-takers who want … Continue reading Do You Even Lift, Bro?
"A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office and says, hey doc, my brother's crazy! He thinks he's a chicken. Then the doc says, why don't you turn him in? Then the guy says, I would but I need the eggs. I guess that's how I feel about relationships. They're totally crazy, irrational, and absurd, but we … Continue reading We Need the Eggs
A good friend recently told me he is training for his first marathon. I was ecstatic. He told me this at a party, so I responded how any rational runner would -- by completely ignoring everyone else and geeking out about marathon minutiae. We talked about shoes. We talked about diet. We talked about spreadsheets. … Continue reading Solitary Until It Isn’t
The race is over, and by most measures it was a huge success. I crossed the finish line with no injuries, I ran faster than my most recent half marathon, I completed an insanely hilly course without losing my cool, and I had an absolute blast. But now what? For months I've had a set … Continue reading Now What?